This may seem crazy, but…

…I’m starting to look forward to the bar exam.

There is, of course, the biggest reason to look forward to the bar exam for any future lawyer… After the exam it will (hopefully) be over forever.

And then there’s the reason a now-mom, future lawyer might be looking forward to the bar exam… You see, I am flying 1/2-way across the country to take the exam & while I was terrified when I purchased my plane tickets (I have never been away from T for this long before) I am now so tired & worn down that I am just looking forward to having my own bed for two nights (even if there is a grueling exam on the other end of those solo nights). You see, studying for the bar in my house has coincided with a sleep regression & recurring illness & now super-early wake-ups… so I’m way beyond worrying about missing my dear son.

I mean, this exam is serious stuff… But somehow I can’t totally get it out of my head that I’m not headed for a spa or something equally relaxing…

And then, I remember that I will have to pump, and for some reason that (and not the EXAM!?) brings me back from my illusions. (Seriously, I haven’t pumped for almost 6 months, and just the thought of firing that thing up is enough to make me cringe… yeah, to say I hated pumping would be an understatement… T, my son, better thank me one day…).

It certainly won’t be a vacation, but it will (in some twisted way) be “me” time… something I feel I haven’t had in a long while.

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