MFA Dad & I were talking about dealing with sleep & the cry it out thing the other night. We had both just read the blog post now making the rounds: The Dangers of Crying It Out. This was an interesting post & provided a great cultural background for our collective obsession with sleep training.
I think there may be something to the science that suggests there is a link to trouble later for the child who is left to cry herself to sleep. And I can’t say that these types of studies did not influence my decision to never do CIO with T.
But I also don’t think the leap from sleep training to problems later in life (as in, CIO now = anxious adult) is direct or clearly proven (& even if it were proven, I’m fairly certain different infants & children react differently to CIO).
MFA Dad doesn’t really care about the science when it comes to the topic of sleep, though. As he points out, our children are more than pet projects, waiting to be groomed for success at every step. He’s right, as usual.
No, our babes are real people right now, and they need the people the know & trust & love to treat them like real-people-right-now. They need us to respond with as much love & patience as we can muster. They need us to respond every time that we can sanely & safely do so (I say this because there have been times when I was so sleep deprived & so crazed that I had to let T cry while I got back-up—aka MFA Dad—or gathered my composure).
So whether it will make T a well-adjusted child or a more content adult, I don’t think we’ll ever know. And it doesn’t matter. He is who he is, right now & into the future.